The Center for a Stateless Society published its rather extensive political quiz Wednesday.

It turned out that I am not as entirely anti-militaristic as I thought, only 71 percent. Economically, I’m a 72 percent leftist, which is evident in my affinity with worker self-management. I had a feeling that some of the questions did not measure what they might have wanted to measure, but on balance, the quiz was very insightful — and I think accurate. Measuring along five different axises, it certainly was more in-depth than the libertarian Nolan Chart survey.

The “Find Your Philosophy Quiz” is available here.

To members of the Bilderburg Group, Trilateral Commission, Council on Foreign Relations, producers of Dancing with the Stars, et al.,

I am writing this letter in order to offer my services to the New World Order (NWO). Over the last several years, I have become aware of your activities of installing a one-world government and/or depopulating 90 percent of the world’s population.

As an offer of goodwill, I first want to make some basic house cleaning items that I would suggest implementing regardless of whether or not my services are compatible with the mission(s) of the NWO.

Most importantly, though I am not aware of your current accounting practices, I would strongly suggest implementing stricter confidentiality agreements with whomever is responsible for the accounting records. There is far too much information floating around regarding who is getting paid by whom. I do not mean to be rude, but that should be the top priority of the NWO for the immediate future. Being disclosed as a paid member of the NWO is extremely damaging to one’s character. Should I become a trusted member of the NWO, I would most certainly require that my payroll information be held in the strictest privacy.

Secondly, in my opinion, members need to cease publicly using the phrases “new world order,” “global governance,” or other similarly haunting collectivist phrases. Alledged members of the NWO, like Henry Kissinger and George Bush Sr.,  are most responsible for those phrases becoming a part of the popular vernacular. I might suggest using phrases like “local option,” “smart governance,” or “sustainable security.”

With those suggestions in mind, I want to emphasize again that I do not personally approve any practices of implementing a global government or depopulating the world. However, my education and experience qualify my as being an excellent candidate for your plans for world domination. I have a flexible schedule and am able to work on a part-time or full-time basis under the right circumstances.

I look forward to hearing from you and hope everyone in the NWO has a most wonderful day.

All the best,
justino

I admit, the video above cracked me up.

On a serious note, I feel sorry for the young man who posted it. The lessons he is learning now will likely be the foundation for his worldview and affect the relationships he has with others. He no doubt has empathy for others who are being bullied at school and wants more than anything for his harassment to stop. He might recognize that school attendance is made compulsory by government and to some degree by his family, so he sees no reasonable escape from his present circumstances. He even said that he has thought about committing suicide, so he must believe his options are severely constrained.

When he matures, he will very likely, if he has not already, carry the same mistaken notions forward with him into society, that there is no feasible means of avoiding morally corrupt people and that therefore an entity must exist that is powerful enough to defend against abusive people. The most readily available candidate for that power is government, so a strong centralized nanny government is key to safety.

According to Dr. Charles Whitfield’s heirachy of needs, safety is second only to survival. Comparatively, freedom ranks 19th.

That is the root concern liberty activists must address, I believe. We can tell people all about how government is our greatest abuser (and they might agree), but any call to weaken or abolish nanny government — a so-called necessary evil — is interpreted as a greater threat to their safety. The devil that we know is better than the devil we don’t know, as the saying goes. What we have to communicate is that life offers much more opportunity than was available to them as a child. You are not trapped in abusive relationships. You are free of them the moment you want to be. You don’t have to associate with people who have a history of hurting people. Therefore, it is not necessary for a nanny government to watch over us and “keep ‘protecting’ you by commanding you to bow down and serve him; by requiring you to do this, and forbidding you to do that,” as Lysander Spooner said.

They wouldn’t be left abandoned to the biggest bully on the block, which incidentally now is the case. Natural law ensures that those bullies would cut their own throats first. The market demand for security would eliminate the remaining stray bullies, and individual compassion would care for the less fortunate. So I don’t resent statists (those who believe individuals exist to serve the well-being of the state); I offer them my sympathy for their burden: believing evil to be “necessary.”

The Dessert

Katy (NARRATOR) – The year is 2019. Things are not all that different than they were 10 years ago. The television reporters seem pretty confident that the Detroit car makers just need a few more months of support, and then they’ll get things turned around. Commander Obama’s food rations have been very generous this year. The chocolate quota alone is up almost three percent over this time last year.

Justin, age six, needs to raise money for his over expenditure of carbon credits at recess last week. He exhaled an estimated three pounds of carbon dioxide on the Nancy Pelosi Elementary jungle gym alone, according to his bio-feedback implant. This is where our tale of a young San Francisco native’s transformation to individualism from divisive collectivism begins.

Here we see Justin, who thinks he has a foolproof plan.

Justin – I know what I’ll do; Bobby is always talking about how big his allowance is. He doesn’t even spend it all, I hear. He’s one of those greedy savers. I’m just going to go over there and kick him in the leg until he gives me some too. It’s no fair that he has more than me.

Katy (NARRATOR) – Justin gets his way. He had to kick his old friend Bobby three times until Bobby surrendered his lunch money. But in the attack, little Bobby dropped and destroyed his Chuck Norris hologram action figure. And now the other kids are worried that they may be next victim.

Scene

Justin (SITTING DOWN) – That was not too bad. I’m able to buy some more carbon credits, but now no one wants to play with me. I just don’t get it.

Katy (STANDING NEXT TO JUSTIN) – Do you know why no one wants to play with you any more? It’s because they are afraid you will start kicking them and take their lunch money or break their things.

Justin – Hey, don’t I recognize you? You’re the leader of that opposition group that’s talking about “individual rights.” Well, what about society. Who’s going to protect the minority?

Katy – Well, the smallest minority is the individual. Now, if you want your friends back, you’ll have to apologize and replace the broken action figure.

Justin – You’re right. My mom always says it’s bad to hit people. It’s still not fair that that they have more than me. I know what I’ll do. I’ll form a democracy, so that everyone can get what they want. And I can raise enough money for a Chuck Norris action figure and everyone will be treated the same. Why didn’t I think of this before?

Katy – Oh, boy!

Scene

Katy (NARRATOR) – Over the next few days, Justin organizes the school playground by promising the fourth graders that they won’t have to worry about the third graders taking all swing sets and teeter totters. Almost all the third graders, except those promised leadership positions in the new government, turned against the idea.

A slight majority of the playground supported the motion, and the dawn of a new democracy began. But not long after, some unintended problems came to be realized.

Justin (TALKING TO KATY) – I never knew how expensive this new democracy would be. We’ve already had to raise the jungle gym tolls twice this week. Almost all the money we’ve raised has been to pay officials’ salaries or to fund the military against the third grader’s militia attacks. Worse yet, I’ve got almost no money left for the Chuck Norris hologram action figure. We actually owe the fifth grade middle schoolers two day’s worth of debt.

Katy – If you really want to raise those funds, then you need to provide a product that people value.

Justin – All six of my non-vegan friends tells me that my mom makes the best turkey sandwiches. I know what I’ll do. She wouldn’t mind make a few more sandwiches each morning. 

Katy – Now, Justin, this is your debt, not you mom’s.

Justin – I guess.

Scene

Katy (NARRATOR) – The next day, Justin brings six freshly made turkey sandwiches that exactly followed his mom’s recipe. He sells them all in a flash, raising a good sum of money. However, others in the new government see Justin’s good fortunes as an opportunity to exploit.

Justin (NEXT TO KATY) – This is just great. I woke up an hour early this morning to make those sandwiches and the playground is taxing half of my income. Since the grocery store that our vice president’s mom owns won a no-bid contract to be the exclusive food supplier, my supplies costs are going to double. Oh, what’s the point? I’ll never raise the money fast enough with these costs.

Katy – You know, Justin. You’ve got to give the people a reason to resist. What are they missing out on? If you can provide that, you’ll be in the homestretch.

Scene

Katy (NARRATOR) – Justin spent all day pondering this question, and then suddenly like a bolt of lightening, it hit him. He has his answer. He can abolish the government sanctions, raise enough money for the new Chuck Norris hologram action figure, and then get his old friends back again.

Justin (NEXT TO KATY) – Look what I have here. I call it barbecue tofu. Since almost of the school’s parents make their kids eat vegetarian meals, the students crave the taste of meat. What’s the next best option? Meet flavored tofu. With some help from my mom, I created this tofu that has all the taste of barbecue and none of the meat. So almost everyone is happy. That grocery store does not sell barbecue, so I told all my customers that if they did not protect my rights to purchase my supplies where I needed, then I couldn’t serve them these great meals any longer. 

Best of all, I’ve convinced the third and fourth graders that we don’t need all this bureaucracy to tell us what to do. The only one benefiting is the bureaucracy itself. We’ve got to stand up for our rights, and not let our neighbors be taken advantage of, because we could be next.

The End